I woke up at 8am this morning, & had to share why I love journaling.
There's a bin....okay several bins of journals that I wrote from age 7 all the way up until I got married (at 23). I wrote...and wrote...and wrote.
And one day someone told me that writing was a waste of my time and that it was just reminding me of all the "shit" that was happening". So I stopped.
I'm working with my therapist on control, and really recognizing that things happen and if we don't put a "label" on them....they are hard to fix. So --- I'm learning to talk about what happened for 15 years of my life. I am finding my pen and paper again, which is helping me find my VOICE again.
This tiny little space on the internet feels like mine. Although public, because I see a lot of value in sharing exeperiences to help others....this space i's mine.
One day the kids will read it and say "I see why we lived tiny", or "I get why we had a garden".....or "I could tell mom was different when we moved to Golden". I'm not sure what they'll think or say - but I wish I would've gotten snapshots into my moms life to see why certain things were done.
This space is about gratitude. It's looking at each experience that I am going through and remembering it. I spent a lot of time teaching people through my marketing company about "trust the process", and although I was always referring to the process of marketing - I realize now it was more about what was happening in life.
And what is the significance of waking up at 8am....for the last few years I wasn't getting more than 5 hours of sleep at night, waking up with night terrors, night sweats and pure panic. I couldn't fall asleep, I couldn't stay asleep & by 8am half the day had already passed for me. Between going through a divorce, having a stalker, being evicted twice...losing my business through the divorce, going from making 800,000 a year to 40k a year,.....let's just say my anxiety was HIGH & when I tried to sleep it would come to the surface.
Our mornings are glorious.....I'm not exaggerating either. Before everyone was waking up and hustling out the door, and now there's just...more time and space.
I think the fact that the kids take a bus, Neil's work starts a little later and I am more "myself" the mornings are slower and it feels incredible.
Mornings Before living in a tiny house:
Neil woke up at 5:00am (AM!) to drive into the city and start work for 6, and sometimes wouldn't get home till 6pm.
Megan woke up at 5:15am because for some reason she could hear everything Neil was doing even though the home was big. So she'd start work by 5:30am, and then...by starting the work day early she wouldn't be done until 9pm.
The kids -- woke up at 6:30 to get ready to be out the door for 7:30am
We couldn't find bags, clothes...keys, wallets.....even though we lived in a clean environment I would often joke I was a "beautiful mess". Aka = a disorganized shit show.
Mornings now that we're living in a tiny house:
7:00 am Neil wakes up
7:15am Megan up & we have a cup of coffee
7:30am Neil heads out the door for work, Megan wakes the kids up.
7:30-8:05 the kids get ready, have breakfast
8:15am The kids are on the bus so Megan
8:30am - Megan gets ready for work, does a driveway walk, showers, has breakfast...knows that work will be there at 9:30am
9:30am Megan starts work
Why are mornings different now that we live in a tiny home?
1. Everyone knows where everything is -- there's no extra laundry piles, there's no extra food hanging around, the kids have ONE spot to put their bags after school, one water bottle in the drawer, one spot to hang their coats....no matter what everything has a place & that reduces chaos in the mornings.
2. Our minds are slower, we don't feel the rush of the city.
3. We're not cleaning every night, I watch a lot of Instagram Reels showing how to quickly clean your kitchen at night -- and I don't have to do any of that. Because ---- well there's only a few things to tidy and then it's done. I don't need a special routine or nightly checklist -- there's just a simple small list of get done and they ...get done.
4. I am sleeping better, my anxiety / anger / sadness is going away and that makes the rest of the family a lot more calm. It's a powerful thing when mom is in a good spot = everyone sort of shifts.
I can't say for sure if the calm feelings are from tiny living or mountain living...or both. I can't say if the GIANT mountain sized life shift makes me feel euphoric or if it's that I'm not dealing with the chaos that was "before".
I'm not even sure if it's the fact that I don't have TV, I don't watch the news, and ....well I don't have any friends here so the conversations can't shift towards the shit that's happening in the world.
I spend a lot of time thinking....why does life feel better? All the while just focusing on making sure I'm looking at what's in front of me and NOT over-thinking. I can share with you that life feels better because of all the small and big changes that I'm making.
Some intentional and some are just happening for me. Mornings look a lot different - and I'm embracing every single moment.
Happy Weekend xo
Megan Moore
>>> Our family of four lives in a 400sqft tiny home, while running a Marketing Agency in Golden British Columbia. <<<
